I Choose!

As I look back over 2010 and into 2011, I am amazed at all the things that have happened! Death, new life, traveling, mundane-everyday stuff, great books read, emotional and spiritual growth...on and on!

So, what does this coming year hold? Probably more of the same! And, is there a point to all of this? Does what I think, or do, or say really matter in the larger scheme of things? I think so! I might not be famous or well-known or any of those things, but my life has significance in God!

I'm learning that He delights in me...dotes on me...is crazy about me. I was in his heart and mind before the universe was made. He had already planned out my existence. These thoughts are too high and mighty for me to really take in and comprehend. I seem to see more of my failures and faults than I see worth....but God doesn't look at me that way!

And so, what I decide to do or not do, even today, means more than I can possibly understand. What I say to others, how I respond to each person that passes in and out of my life, how I treat Rusty, how much time I spend on the computer or not, what I think about...all of it has meaning. God wants my whole heart! All of it.

I'm learning about "servant hood." What does that look like? How can I actually serve others--even those closest to me with an attitude of gentleness and graciousness? Once again, I see my failures and faults, but God does not look at me through those "tinted glasses" of a finite being. He sees me through a vast heart of love and mercy that I cannot comprehend!

So, today...I choose to place my life, my hands and feet, my mouth, my whole being into His most capable hands! I give myself to the workings of the Holy Spirit and I wait to see what kind of great adventure lies before me.

It might just be vacuuming, dusting, ironing, cooking--or it might be something high and grand! Whatever it is...I will keep in mind how much God loves me and what I'm worth to Him!

This is for Peri!

No excuse! I won't do it to you! I'll just write!

I started taking an on-line (sort-of) writing course through the Institute of Children's Literature. I love it, but I can't set aside the time that I need to--to write! What's wrong with this picture?

I have all kinds of things bottled up inside that I want to say. I want to tell stories, share experiences, and possibly be of encouragement to some little kid or young person.

If I can make my bed and keep the kitchen fairly clean, surely I can sit down at my computer and write. You would think.

So, my Christmas shopping is done. I have about 5 gifts left to wrap. I sent off two huge boxes of books to my daughter who arrives at my son's home in Delaware tomorrow with her 2 kids in tow (from Dubai), etc, etc. So, why can't I make time to write for my class, like I'm supposed to?

Any suggestions?

Clown Baby

We raced blindly down the gravel road on our bikes. All we knew was that Clown Baby was right behind us and if he caught up to us, we would be in big trouble.

Clown Baby was a young bull calf that my dad was raising for the summer. Even though we loved reaching through the bars of his pen to feed him carrots and feel his black, sandpaper tongue-- we knew better than to actually get inside!

Clown Baby’s little nubby horns were pushing up through the hair on his head. He loved to push against our hands and we could see the glitter in his eyes when he did it. Dad warned us again and again that Clown Baby would hurt us if we ventured too close.

To this day, I have no idea how he got out, but he was not only mean, he was smart! One minute, we were circling the yard on our bikes, the next minute—here he came. A black and white streak headed right towards us.

We took off down the driveway as fast as we could peddle. Up the hill was a big left-over pile of dirt from building the road. We raced towards it—jumped off our bikes and scrambled to the top as quickly as we could. In terror we watched Clown Baby lunging towards us!

Dad roared up the driveway in his old Willy’s Jeep. He jumped out, yelling, “Clown Baby!” The sound of his voice must have distracted that calf, because he swung around and put his head down—charging right for my dad!

A quickly swung rope brought Clown Baby to a halt and dad tossed that calf right over the side of the pickup and jumped right in after him—tying him up snug!

We were all crying and blubbering as we staggered down that dirt pile into dad’s open arms! I didn’t know it then, but that night after we went to bed, I heard him tell my mom, “Man, was I scared! When I saw the hole in the fence where that little sucker crawled through—I knew he’d head right for the kids!”

I rolled over and went to sleep. Boy, did I love my dad!

Camping in Circumstances

I can't believe how long it's been since I last wrote! I used to journal almost every day and thought that I might get back into the habit if I had access to a computer. However, I find that I haven't gotten back into the habit like I thought I would.

I have something I want to "talk about". It may or may not be of interest to those of you who may stumble across this blog. But, it's meant a great deal to me lately!

Numbers 9: 17-23 in the Bible reads as follows: "When the Cloud lifted above the Tent, the People of Israel marched out; and when the Cloud descended the people camped. the People of Israel marched at God's command and they camped at his command. As long as the Cloud was over The Dwelling, they camped. Even when the Cloud hovered over The Dwelling for many days, they honored God's command and wouldn't march. They stayed in camp, obedient to God's command, as long as the Cloud was over The Dwelling, but the moment God issued orders they marched. If the Cloud stayed only from sunset to daybreak and then lifted at daybreak, they marched. Night or day, it made no difference--when the Cloud lifted, they marched. It made no difference whether the Cloud hovered over The Dwelling for two days or a month or a year, as long as the Cloud was there, they were there. And when The Cloud went up, they got up and marched. They camped at God's command and they marched at God's command. They lived obediently by God's orders as delivered by Moses."

OK...that was a bit long-winded, so here's my what has been going through my mind on this one. First of all, this part of the Bible was written in Hebrew. When things are repeated--it's because they were important. We use punctuation to emphasize importance nowadays...but back when this was written, to repeat something again and yet again, showed great importance.

Then....I began to think about the circumstances that Travis and I are in. Taking care of my mother-in-law, etc. It appears that "The Cloud" has camped right here! (The Cloud represented God's Presence to the Children of Israel.) It appears that we need to learn to camp in these circumstances and not be whining or discontented with what God has brought into our lives! Just learn to be obedient in what He's asked us to do.

Has it been easy to always answer kindly? Or to show patience when I've been awakened again for the 3rd or 4th time during the night? I must admit that I've failed in these areas...however, I'm learning to settle my heart--to reach beyond myself where I put my hand in God's Hands and ask for His help! He's got way more love and patience then I ever dreamed of and has promised to pour out His help if we need it. We just have to ask!

I'm asking all the time! Until next time!

Brick-A-Brack

Good morning...oh, such good intentions! I'm going to write more often--opps, didn't do it again! (Sigh)

My mother-in-law is in the hospital undergoing surgery on a parathyroid gland, as I write this. We had 2 really amazing days with her...wide awake, talkative, not too terribly ill, but last night after I had put her to bed...that blasted gland gave her another high dose of calcium and she fell back into a muttering, out-of-touch, poor lady! We're hoping for the best--that this removal of said gland will restore her to a much better state of living!

Someone said to me just the other day, that we love new babies! We can't wait to hold them, coo over them, etc., etc. But, our old people--we find it very unnerving and difficult to deal with them. They need just as much holding and cooing, etc. How true that is! I've watched as Travis or his brother hug their mom...she just melts up next to them. When I walk her--I hold one hand and put an arm around her back. She leans into me. As I feed her, I stroke her hand and she sighs with pleasure--even as she's trying desperately to swallow her soup or juice. We, as humans, need touch, don't we?

Such little things we take for granted. A nice hot shower, clean clothes, brushed teeth! I watch her as we perform all these little things and she glows afterwards. She doesn't necessarily remember any of it, but you can see the cares of life wash away--just like the water running down the drain!

She said to me yesterday, "It's the little things that matter! You can sit on a mountaintop, but you can't sit on a pin!" Isn't that great?

So--let me mention a few little things! I finished painting our office! Yahoo! I had the idea of where I wanted the computer--but Travis suggested a different location--in front of the window and it's wonderful! (It was much easier since all the wiring was on that side of the room, too!) We were able to acquire 2 new sofa sleepers over Labor Day weekend and have the office and basement set up--ready for company!

I'm still working on getting a few more things put away in the office...but it's pretty much organized. Just have to hang a few pictures and I'm finished!

Travis and I have started back once again on watching our food intake and I'm really trying to exercise. This time, I write it on the calendar in the bathroom that is hung over the scales! Ha! It really does help! (And when I mow the yard, I count that as my exercise, too!) It's a big yard and I'm pooped when I finish! That should count for something!

As I close--I want to express my gratefulness to God! I couldn't possibly live this life without Him. He opens my eyes to the little things and reminds me how important they really are! Without Him, I would be constantly trying to sit on the pins and not climb the mountains!

Goodbye Lament

It's 5:45 am and I'm very sad! My daughter, Jessica, along with her two little boys have driven away with Travis to catch a plane in St. Louis as they are on their return trip to Dubai. All the "children noise" is gone and the house will be hauntingly quiet again. Don't get me wrong...I like quiet, but the thought of being so far apart makes my heart ache!

The coffee is brewing, so I'll fill my favorite cup, curl up on the couch for a few precious moments with God and pour out my sadness to Him. Life will pick up again, I'll be busy with all kinds of activities, but for this one tiny blog I'll fling out a lament for my daughter's leaving!

O Jessica...que Dios te bendiga y te amo mi hijita tan, tan preciosa!

The Little Woman

I'm reading the book, "The Little Woman" by Gladys Alyward, to my mother-in-law! What an amazing story of endurance and fortitude, not to mention a tremendous love for God! A must-read! Hollywood bought the rights to her story years ago and produced the movie, "The Inn of the Sixth Happiness" starring Ingrid Bergman. I've watched it over and over again!

Of course, being Hollywood, they had to throw in a love story that never existed and weren't really able to portray the tremendous suffering and danger that Gladys lived through. Interestingly enough, my son-in-law's grandmother, Dora Chamberlin, actually had the opportunity to meet Gladys in England, years ago. Dora gave me a little packet of newspaper articles and an actual bookmark from China that Gladys had given to her. It's very precious to me!

Gladys was an uneducated woman...a parlor maid, who felt a call of God on her life to go to China. And she was amazingly used by the Lord to accomplish things that we can only imagine! It gives me hope for my own life! There is such tremendous hope in God! Not just a religious belief, but I have experienced His personal touch over and over and over again!

And to close...I have to let you know that I'm typing on my very own brand new computer here at home! Hey...if you want to hear more about Gladys and don't have time to read and find the book, I'll be glad to post some of her stories! :-)